Friday, March 27, 2009


Fluff and Fold has been classified as a romantic comedy porno and I have no argument with that classification. Most of the romance is between the two main actors with Randy Spears providing most of the comedic moments.

The plot centers around Christine (Jessica Drake) and Scott (Brad Armstrong, who also directed the movie). Christine has kicked out her cheating boyfriend and meets Scott at the Laundromat. She isn't really ready for another relationship, but Scott eventually wins Christine over and they begin an affair.

Later, when Christine thinks that Scott is cheating on her, she dumps him on the spot, since she doesn't want another cheating boyfriend. The movie has a funny fantasy spot here as Christine imagines dumping Scott's head repeatedly in the washer. After Christine dumps him, Scott spends days in the laundromat waiting for her to show up again. So instead of the typical porno plot of the man just hooking up with the next available female, we actually see some human emotions in the male. I thought this was pretty unique for a porno.

Randy Spears plays the part of the Russian laundromat owner and provides most of the comedy in the movie. Randy is probably the best actor in porno today. He always commits to his character. There are a lot of comedy bits with Randy and some of the other characters, but you'll just have to watch the movie, since they are too numerous to mention.

One more thing that I would like to mention is the g/g scene. The scene is presented as a character is having a "fantasy" about two women he sees in the laundromat. Since g/g scenes in straight porno are enacted for male fantasies in the first place, this makes the scene really work.

The only wasted scene in the movie involves Evan Stone. This scene adds very little to the movie and appears it may have been added just to include Evan and Aria and a squirting scene.

Stars: Jessica Drake, Cherokee, Lezley Zen, Aria, Shay Sights, Dolorian, Tommy Gunn, Evan Stone, Randy Spears, Chris Cannon, Brad Armstrong and directed by Brad Armstrong.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

DIRTY MOVIE or What It Would Be Like If Rod Serling Wrote A Porno

This movie appears on the surface to be about a man obsessed with an actress he cannot have; but in the end the plot twist could have come right out of The Twilight Zone.

Evan Stone inherits a house from his late Grandfather and in the basement he finds a projector set up with an old stag film. He becomes obsessed with an actress in the movie (Katie Morgan). He wants to know more about the movie and in his search Evan finds the director's grandson. The grandson tells Evan that the film he found in the house is the last copy and that the movie is cursed and should be destroyed. But Evan can't stop watching the stag film and thinking about Katie Morgan.... and then..........sorry, I can't give away anymore of the plot.

It was odd seeing Evan Stone in a dramatic role, rather than his usual hammy comedy roles. This is the second movie that I have seen recently with Katie Morgan in a g/g scene and both times and she brings a lot of heat to these scenes. There was only one really wasted scene in Dirty Movie and that is when Evan goes to track down the grandson and the movie grinds to a halt with a very dull sex scene that the grandson is shooting and starring in.

Also, I thought the direction of Dirty Movie was a cut above your standard porno. Lots of nice camera angles. A special standout scene is when Evan is dreaming that Katie Morgan is not in the stag movie, but actually with him. Here you get a color sex scene in the foreground, with a different angle of the same scene in black and white on the projection screen in the background. This was an unique shot to me.

Stars: Hillary Scott, Katie Morgan, Samantha Ryan, Sammie Rhodes, Sandra Romain, Evan Stone, Kurt Lockwood, Tommy Gunn. Directed by Barry Wood

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


IMPROPER CONDUCT: When the talented cellist is offered a prime spot in the pit, she leaps at the chance. But can she overlook the leader's controlling ways? As the frustrated conductor waves his baton harder and harder to make his point, can her love break through the block on his heart? Will they ultimately join to make incredible music together?

The acting is way above par for a porno. However, the story is so terrible and so deadly serious, that not too far into the movie, it just became funny to me. I don't think that I have ever seen a porno that tried to take itself this serious. Just think of some serious romantic cable TV add sex you have IMPROPER CONDUCT.

Stars: Devinn Lane, Asia Carrera, Jessica Drake, Aria, Bridgette Kerkove, Steven St. Croix, Scott Styles, Evan Stone and directed by Brad Armstrong

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Jonathan Morgan Let Me Down

ONE SLEEPLESS NIGHT. The Plot: When Kylie can' t sleep, the whole world gets turned on. Its just one of those nights, you know the kind, tossing, turning... maybe something's on the tube. Oh yeah, this looks good. If only they would show some great love scenes the way Kylie likes....thus begin the scenes. Starring Brad Armstrong, Calli Cox, Cherie, Jason McCain, Joel Lawrence, Joelean, Kianna, Kyle Stone, Kylie Ireland, Lee Stone, Pay Myne, Terra Part and directed by Jonathan Morgan.

This is actually just a clip movie. A very minimum of a a plot that just gets to the sex scenes. A little of Jonathan Morgan's humor shows through, IF you listen to the words in the background coming from the TV. But One Sleepless Night is absent of Jonathan Morgan's usual fairly well developed humorous plot lines. Plus the movie has such an abrupt ending, it is startling. It actually looks like the movie was never finished or really edited bad. So, it depends on what you looking for if you want to rent this movie. Plot: bare, sex scenes: lots.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009


ART SCHOOL SLUTS. The Plot: At night, when her eyes are closed, Mia lives out the rush of auto-erotica, the climactic combo of smashed vehicles and petrol scented sex-but during the day she's a disenchanted art student wondering why she even bothers getting a degree. Creeped out by her perv teacher who uses art instruction as a come-on, she day-dreams away, living out her Polaroid fantasies.

Starring:Keiko, Talon, Katja Kassin, James Deen, Felix Vicious and directed by Eon McKai

While I give props to the director for using a different sensibility in making this movie, it's just not for me. One major drawback is the industrial music in the background, some of this music was close to inducing a headache. The sex scenes are just as standard as any regular porn movie and all performers appear very uninspired.

Standout in Art School Sluts is the guy with a Super Rooster Mohawk who ties rope and knots around a girl so quick, there is no doubt, he used to be in the Boy Scouts.

Weirdest scene in the movie: Art School Professor has sex with a student on his desk in front of a bored class, while another student takes Polaroids and posts them on the bulletin board.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

THROBIN HOOD - Porn Spoof of Robin Hood

Throbin Hood and his band of Merry Men in tights rebel against the evil Queen and Sheriff Naughty Ham's efforts to collect tax on sex.

Directed by Cash Markman and Starring Alicia Allure, Angelica Sin, Ron Jeremy, Steve Austin, Anna Malle, Nakita Kash, Teri Starr, Alect Metro, Joel Lawrence, Randy Spears

I have noticed that if Cash Markham writes and someone else directs, his storyline often starts to vanish about 3/4 of the way into the movie(a problem a lot of porn movies seem to have). But since Cash Markham wrote and directed this one, you get a good many laughs and a coherent story. I won't give it away, but the archery contest is like nothing you've seen before. A special nod to Ron Jeremy and his great comedic porno acting. Really the only drawback to Throbin Hood is too many fake boobs.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Double Dose of Get Smart Porn Spoofs

Hustler has released 2 different porn spoofs of Get Smart, one is extremely good, the other is extremely bad.

First the good spoof: Get Luckier, directed and written by Cash Markman and starring Dick Smothers, Jr., Katie Morgan, Lee Stone, Shy Love, Cindy Crawford, Tommy Gunn, Bree, Tony Tedeschi.

Dick Smothers, Jr. plays Agent 86 1/2 and does a fine acting job as Maxwell Sharp. Katie Morgan plays Agent 36-26-36, who is actually an undercover agent for S.C.U.M, and as always she does a great job. The plot and the humor pretty much follow what Get Smart would have been like if it was a porn movie. I will give most of the credit to Cash Markham who knows how to write and direct a comedic porn. This is one of the better spoofs of sitcoms that I have seen, funny throughout and with a complete plot. And in my opinion,even with her boob job, Katie Morgan is still the cutest thing in porn. A special nod to Dick Smothers, Jr.(who looks more like Steve Carell playing Don Adams), his acting is top notch throughout the whole movie.

Next the bad spoof: Get Smartass directed by Stuart Canterbury and starring Britney Amber, Dino Bravo, Eden Adams, Envi, Eric Swiss, Kayla Paige, Rod Fontana, Tony de Sergio, Veronica Jett, Veronica Rayne.

With the world threatened by the evil organization known as P.E.N.I.S., Maxwell Smartass and Agent 69 are ready to save the day. This is probably the worst porn sitcom spoof that I have ever seen. The plot is skimpy and the attempts at humor never jell. The funniest part of the movie is the g/g scene in which the two females spend 6-8 minutes striking poses for the camera. So ludicrous, I was laughing out loud. I am going to give you the only funny line in the movie to save anyone from a wasted rental/purchase. Maxwell misses his insertion and states "Missed It By That Much". Avoid this one, if at all possible.