BAD INFLUENCE

This is a great 30 minute movie, unfortunately the complete running time for the movie is around 90 minutes.

Bad Influence is a porn version of The Graduate, which begs the question, why wasn't the title more of a give away to this fact? Even the front cover of the box doesn't give you a clue, and the back cover just barely hints at what the movie is spoofing with the words: "Mrs Wilkenson are you trying to seduce me?"

Most of the first few scenes in Bad Influence ape The Graduate with Dick Smothers Jr. playing the Dustin Hoffman part. This includes the famous Mrs. Robinson scene with the camera looking through a bent leg. I say most, because the first sex scene with Randy Spears and his secretary has nothing to do with the rest of the movie.

Around the 30 minute mark Bad Influence seems to lose complete focus on spoofing the original, since at this point there are several plot/sex scenes that have nothing to do with The Graduate. One of these scenes includes an actor dressed as Elvis (for no rhyme or reason at this point in the movie, although he does make a well placed appearance in the final scene).

Bad Influence finally kicks back into spoofing the original plot of The Graduate with Dustin getting the girl he has waited years for....and at this point they drive off and stop and have sex on the hood of his car....WTF this is what he had waited years to do...have sex on the hood of his car. The movie concludes with a wedding scene, although Bad Influence twists the ending with Mrs Wilkenson (Ona Zee) trying to stop the wedding.

As I've stated in previous reviews, I'm a fan of Cash Markman, since his movies always contain well written dialogue, and that is no exception with Bad Influence. Add in the facts that a lot of the dialogue is humorous and the music in Bad Influence apes the original soundtrack of The Graduate and you get a porn that could have ranked right up with the best of them, IF the director(Cash Markman) had stuck to the basic premise of the original Graduate throughout the whole movie. However, as with most other Markman features that I have seen, Bad Influence starts strong, falls apart somewhere toward the middle and then ends strong. As it is, I'm giving this one a B, since the good parts are way above average.

Bad Influence starring Aurora Snow, Ava Vincent, Cindy Crawford, Ona Zee, Jessica Darlin, Frank Bukkwyd, Dick Smothers Jr, Mark Davis, Lee Stone, Randy Spears, Eric Masterson, Kyle Stone, Brett Rockman, written and directed by Cash Markman

The 70's SHOW - A XXX PARODY

This is the third Lee Roy Myers sitcum that I have seen and none of them have been very good so far(and I've got Cheers in the line-up to be watched).
That's not to say that The 70s Show - A XXX Parody was bad, it just didn't have enough good to overcome the bad.

The sets were all pretty close to the actual The 70's Show. The living room set was almost an exact duplicate, but someone put the TV in the wrong spot....I know that's just a small quibble, but it was it was so close, I was just disappointed to see this one glaring error. The kitchen and the basement sets were also pretty good, just not as good as the living room. The worst of the sets (and it wasn't that bad) was Eric's bedroom. The furniture looked pretty close, but there were posters on the wall that were nothing like the posters on Eric's wall in the real The 70s Show.

All the acting was decent and most of the actors stayed somewhat in character during their sex scenes. As far as looking like their real life counterparts, Hyde (Ralph Long) and Mrs Foreman/Kitty (Rachel Love) were the closest. Rachel Love looked like she was born to play the part of Kitty. As far as the actor who played Eric (Patrick J Knight), he looked like Conan O'Brien to me (Oh CoCo, who knew Jay Leno would drive you into porno!)

The plot of The 70's Show - A XXX Parody was pretty much like a plot you would have seen on the orginal show: the gang is going to see Led Zeppelin and Donna and Eric try to get backstage, but only Donna almost gets the chance (there's a plot point I won't spoil here) , then she lies to Eric and later has to tell him the truth.

The sex scenes of course were WAY TOO LONG, but that's not unsual for these modern sitcums. One sex scene that didn't fit with the character was the scene between Jackie and Hyde. During their sex scene, she tells Hyde to "put it in her rear". If you've ever watched The 70s show, you know this would be way out of character for Jackie.

If you liked The 70s Show, then you'll probably like The 70s Show - A XXX Parody. Just be advised that you're going to be watching a pretty average sitcum, but then The 70s Show was for the most part was a pretty average sitcom. I grade this one a C.

SOMETIMES DREAMS COME TRUE

It was nice here today and we were on our way to a nearby flea market, but I had seen one yard sale in the paper that mentioned records and I decided to stop by there on our way out of town.

I did find 3 LPs and a couple of 45s in the basement, but the real treasure was upstairs in 6 old cardboard storage boxes......homemade video tapes....at first glance they all seemed to be things recorded off TV or Old Westerns (LOTS of Old Westerns), but then I spotted Inside Seka and the more I dug the more I found, the photo above is my final haul.

Here's the classic porn on these 13 video tapes: Up and Coming(Marilyn Chambers), Cells of Passion(Erica Boyer), All American Girls(Kathy Blake), Neon Nights, Throat 12 Years After(Sharon Mitchell), Inside Seka, Inside Desiree Cousteau, Playing With Fire(Brooke West), Women Times Four(Tina Marie), In The Pink(Jacqueline Lorains), Nasty Nurses(Janie Robins), Marilyn Chambers Is Insatiable, Virginia, Teenage Sex Kitten(Julie Lonetree), Tara Tara Tara(Seka), Deep Throat(Linda Lovelace), Swedish Erotica #1, All About Gloria Leonard, Baby Face, plus some Eros Americas(I think this was an old HBO show).

And what was my total for these 13 tapes, plus the 3 LPs, 2 45s, 6 books, and 10 other video tapes......$5.00.....and that's not $5.00 each, that's $5.00 for everything!

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY from MR. X-RAY

MISSIONARY POSITION IMPOSSIBLE

I'm a fan of Cash Markman movies, since they usually have a plot and a lot of comedic dialogue. However, I have often complained that the plots in Markman's movies start to fall apart about halfway through and don't usually get back on track until near the end of the movie. I am happy to report that Missionary Position Impossible does not suffer from what ails his other movies; this one has a coherent plot from start to finish, and of course, lots of great humorous dialogue.

In case you couldn't tell by the title of the movie, Missionary Position Impossible is a spoof of the TV show Mission Impossible. In this porn version, the mission is to stop Senator Blowhard (Mike Horner) who is determined to get rid of all pornography. (Good Luck with that Senator Blowhard!)

The movie starts with Yelps (Steve Austin) getting his mission statement in the back of a porno shop where a peep show is located. The tape recorded message won't self-destruct until the sex scene is over. Yelps masturbates while a couple of girls behind the glass have sex. When he climaxes on the window, the tape burns up and we're ready to move on to the mission.

In the next scene we are introduced to Senator Blowhard, who we find out is actually obsessed with sex (ooh, I think this was a message). During this scene Blowhard has sex in the back of his limo with his campaign manager, Angelica Sin.

Senator Rightly is running against Blowhard and the MPI group decide to have someone dress up like Rightly, film him having sex and give the tape to Blowhard. Since they know Blowhard will broadcast the tape, they will then be able to expose it as a fake and discredit Blowhard. This scene takes place in the front room of the porno shop and I was a little distracted looking at all of the old big box porno vhs tapes that were on the shelves. Where are all of those tapes today....wish I knew, since there were probably lots of classic plot driven old porn movies in the selection.

The next scene has MPI member Rich Handsome pretending to be a masseuse hired for Blowhard's campaign manager, Angelica Sin. While massaging her, she tells him that she knows twenty nine ways to have sex, which of course this being porno, she wants to demostrate. Little does she know that this is being broadcast over the radio to discredit her as Blowhard's campaign manager. Blowhard hears this and demands to be taken back to campaign headquarters.

At his headquarters, he gets into an elevator with Raquel Divine. Little does he know that she is another member of the MPI group. The elevator gets stuck and Blowhard succumbs to Raquel and they have sex in the elevator. I would like to make a note here, that there was a folding chair in the elevator. I know it was placed there for the sex scene, but it was just goofy to have an empty chair in an elevator. The movie ends with the elevator door opening and there is a group of photographers taking pictures, which will of course discredit Blowhard.

One of the best things about Missionary Position Impossible was that all of the sex scenes fit and flowed with the movie, with most of them advancing the plot. Unlike some of today's porn parody/spoofs where most of the sex scenes are inserted into the story just because it's time to have a sex scene.

My only minor complaints are that most of the sex scenes ran on a little bit too long and none of the sex scenes generated much heat between the performers, so I'm giving this one a B+

Missionary Position Impossible starring Angelica Sin, Dee, Kiki Daire, Raquel Devine, Venus Milan, Mike Horner, Rich Handsome, Rod Fontana, Steve Austin and directed by Cash Markman.

SEX at 33 1/3

After months of searching, I recently won this flexi-disc (cardboard record) on EBAY.

This was originally inside High Society Magazine in the December 1979 issue.

If you wonder what is on this record, think "phone sex", but in this case, we'll have to call it "Sex at 33 1/3".

If you would like to listen to the record "The Internet Museum Of Flexi/cardboard/oddity Records" Has A Recording HERE (requires real audio)

WKRP IN CINCINNATI: A XXX PARODY

The plot of WKRP: A XXX Parody is that the station finally came up with a good contest - giving away front row seats to a Supertramp concert. This big promotion will finally allow the station to make a profit. But as luck would have it, the tickets go missing and the station could be in big trouble.

My first clue that this wasn't going to be one the better sitcums is at the very first scene of the movie: Andy is getting ready to go to work and after a very short dialogue sequence with his girlfriend, the movie goes into its first 25 minute sex scene. This scene wasn't only unnecessary, since it had nothing to do with the movie, but appears to have been shot just to bore me from the outset. I must now give thanks to the FF button!

After the sex scene, Andy arrives at work and we get introduced to most of the WKRP regulars. There's some funny dialogue and it looks like maybe the movie will pick up some steam, but instead we get one of the worst actors in the movie, Tee Reel. Either Tee Reel has never seen WKRP and doesn't have any idea who Venus Flytrap is, or he just doesn't have any acting ability. Hard to decide what the case might be, but he is certainly b-a-d and not in a good way. Oh yeah, another 25 minute sex scene follows.

Next up we have some more humorous dialogue and Herb gets Jennifer to agree to go to lunch with him, somehow, this turns into having sex on Jennifer's desk. WTF, from agreeing to lunch to having sex. Either I missed something here, or this was just a sex scene jammed in with no rhyme nor reason. And yes, another 25 minute sex scene.

Finally, we get to an actor that "gets" his part, Evan Stone as Johnny Fever. I know some people don't like Evan, but he has impressed me time and again with his ability to actually act and understand the character he is playing. And at least the sex scene with Evan and the two ladies in the runoff for the Supertramp tickets generates some heat on screen. The scene is also 25 minutes, but I only had to use the FF button sparingly.

The final sex scene is Les and Bailey and the scene makes no logical sense. It appears that the writers couldn't really figure out why Bailey and Les would have sex, they just do, just like in the earlier scene in which Jennifer has sex with Herb. Neither of these scenes make any logical sense with the original characters' personalities. Hey writer(s)! I know this is just a goofy sitcum, but logical use of the characters would have been nice.

This is an 147 minute movie with 125 minutes of sex scenes, leaving 22 minutes of actual movie. I should point out that 22 minutes is approximately the time an original WKRP would have run on TV, taking out time for commercials. And those 22 minutes do contain a pretty good WKRP episode with the double entendres just a little bit more X rated than on the original show. I understand that the bonus disc (which I didn't have with my rental) contains a one hour "party version". If I had know that, I would have just rented the bonus disc. Oh well, live and learn!

WKRP In Cincinnati: A XXX Parody has some pretty funny lines and does have some entertainment value, but the sex scenes were just too long in between the dialogue parts of the movie to hold my interest (with the FF button, I finished the movie in about an hour). The actors were all adequate and for the most part appear that they were cast because they looked somewhat like the original actor, other than for their actual acting ability. With the exceptions being those that I have already pointed out above: Tee Reel as the worst actor and Evan Stone as the best actor of the bunch.

I guess if someone stumbled on this blog, they would be puzzled by the fact that I'm not happy with a porn movie with too much sex and too little story. But I see no reason why there can't be more balance in these new sitcums or for that matter in any modern porn feature. Some of the Golden Age Porn movies could achieve this balance, including sex scenes that would make logical sense in the movies and flow with the plot. I'm pretty sure today's writers/directors are just as smart as the 70s/80s writers/directors....but then again...I could be wrong.

I grade this one a C-

WKRP In Cincinnati: A XXX Parody starring Kagney Linn Karter, Faye Reagan, Ashlynn Brooke, Janet Mason, Ralph Long, Tee Reel, Andy San Dimas, Jackie Daniels, Holly Heart, Ryan McLane, Evan Stone, Scott Lyons, Rod Fontana and directed by Lee Roy Meyers.

Mr. X-RAY and THE FIBONACCI AWARD

XXX MARKS THE PLOT has received THE FIBONACCI AWARD from THE LIGHTNING BUG'S LAIR.

In case you have never checked in on Mr. Bug, do yourself a favor and quit reading this post and click on the link above. Not only does Mr. Bug have an in-depth understanding of movies, but he is also able to give you the facts with a big dollop of humor.

And Now Onto The Award: The Fibonacci is a very special blog award to be given out only to those bloggers and blogs whose work have inspired others. The blog should be one that would cause others to want to passionately create something new and in the process inspire someone else to create a new post and soon marvelous posts are being spawned at a ratio calculable only by some esoteric mathematical formula. If you have received this award your site has been deemed exceptional in the areas of technical skill, graphic layout and worthy content as well as having a certain of accessibility by the general public. What must you do if you receive this award? In order to inspire more and more blogs of high distinction all you have to do is send the award out to a number of blogs greater than the number one. Can be two. Can be four. Can be a dozen. No need to disclose any personal secrets about your self. Your blog is already a small but integral part of a creative process. You be as a single sunflower seed in a giant sunflower. Congratulations on your reception of the mysterious and elusive Fibonacci.

I am passing the prestigious Fibonnaci award onto these blogs of distinction:

1. The Gore Gore Girl - one of the only other blogs I have ever been able to find that discusses porn movies not just for the sex, but for the content.

2. M.Bug - Always something interesting at this blog. A lot of M.Bug's posts help remind me of my own childhood.

3. WFMU's Beware of The Blog - eclectic group of music fanatics.

4. Pornonomy - very well written blog concentrating on the classic golden age of porn movies.

Honorable Mention since it's not really a blog: Truckers, Shuckers, Freeks and Geeks - where else can you find an Englishman living in Oregon playing offbeat country music.

DIRTY LITTLE CHEATERS

Welcome to my 50th review, somewhat of a milestone for me.
When I was younger, I felt that I could put sentences together in a fairly coherent manner; but over the years it has become harder for me to get my thoughts into the written word without some effort. I'm hoping to get another 50 reviews up next year. Now onto the review of Dirty Little Cheaters.

The movie opens with a secretary (the always great Katie Morgan, appearing here before her ridiculous boob job) and her boss (Nikko Night) having sex in the office. While having sex, they carry on a conversation about all the people they have cheated on. This is a pretty unique scene, given the fact that the dialogue makes it quite different than your typical moans and groans and "give it to me" contained in most porno sex scenes. The only other performer that I can think of that carries off scenes like this is Steven St. Croix.

The movie cuts back and forth between the current scene with Katie and Nikko to the stories that they are talking about. One of these scenes includes a video camera being used and this gives Nikko the idea to set up a camera at home to find out if his wife is cheating on him.

We soon find that the Nikko’s wife (Alana Evans) is definitely cheating on him, but she spots the camera and makes sure the camera captures her at her best. Alana plants her own camera and catches her husband Nikko having sex with some girls from the local college who are going door to door selling cookies (hey at least it's not the Pizza Girl!).

Later at the office, Nikko confronts his wife about her cheating and of course Alana is able to show him the video of his own cheating. Plus we find out that the cookie selling college girls were actually a test that Alana had set up to see if Nikko was cheating on her. They both wind up admitting that they got off watching the video of the other one cheating.

It appears that the movie needed one more sex scene as we see Nikko filming a couple of women having sex and he joins them on camera for the final scene of the movie.

I watched Dirty Little Cheaters several months ago and remember feeling that I should have liked it better. It had a decent plot and if the last scene had been omitted, the plot would have made logical sense from start to finish. There was no bad background music during the sex scenes (actually there was no background music). Dirty Little Cheaters was well directed and had no fake boob jobs. The performers seemed engaged in their scenes and for the most part stayed pretty much in character. Still, I felt something was lacking overall, but I just can't put my finger on what it was about this movie that keeps me from rating it any higher than a B.

starring Alana Evans, Brittany Skye, Becca Bratt, Katie Morgan, Honey, Nikko Night, Rafe, Malorie Marx, Celine Maxima, Nikko Night and directed by James Avalon

BRITNEY REARS 1

I first saw the preview for Britney Rears on the Not The Brady's dvd. Even though Not The Brady's was only marginally entertaining, Will Ryder had done three of my favorite spoof/parody movies: Not Bewitched (2008), Not Three's Company and Not Married With Children (both from 2009). I thought maybe Britney Rears would be worth viewing, even realizing that it was one of Will Ryder's earlier efforts from 2004.

It didn't take me long to see that Britney Rears 1 - Wild Back Stage Sex Party has more to do with Will Ryder's vignette/gonzo type movies than it does with his better feature parody/spoof movies. Add in the facts that there were some bad looking fake boobs, cheap sets and uninspired sex scenes and I knew the best thing for me was to get it out of the player and return it to the rental company.

If you notice, this is Britney Rears 1, there were at least three more that I am aware of. I rate this one a D+

Britney Rears - Wild Backstage Sex Party starring: Britney Rears, Dawn Kelly, Mila Brazil, Mr. Marcus, Nicole Brazzle, Nyomi Marcela, Serena Marcus, Takota and directed by Will Ryder

SANTA CLAUS at The SEX SHOP

MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS

A SPECIAL CHRISTMAS EPISODE

THAT'S REVIEWING!

Sometimes it's awful hard to find decent reviews of porno movies, especially Golden Age movies. One day while I was looking for a review, I ran across Dirtymoviedevotee on imdb.com. When I checked his other reviews, I saw that he had approximately 450 reviews. And these are all great reviews, well worth reading. Do yourself a favor and check out the link to the reviews below:



Reviews by Dirtymoviedevotee

SINGING! DANCING! SEX! Can Porn Carry A Tune?

You've already watched Glee this week, but you're still in the mood for a musical. Why not try a Porn Musical?

The first porn musical
I ever saw was Alice
in Wonderland. This movie had top notch production with great sets and actual acting and singing. Alice in Wonderland is equal to any made for TV movie musical that you would have seen during the same time period. As far as the sex in the movie, it starts out rather tame, but eventually builds to regular 70s porno sex. I would definitely recommended Alice In Wonderland for anyone interested in a unique porno spoof with singing and dancing. Alice in Wonderland was so good that all future porn musicals I have seen have had to be graded to this level of perfection. The only bad thing I can say about this movie is that the transfer to DVD was sort of faded and a little dark. I grade this one an A.

stars: Bradfor Armdexter, Gila, J.P. Paradine, Juliet Graham, Kristine DeBell, Melvina Peoples, Nancy Dare, Sue Tsengoles, Terri Hall, Alan Novak, Bruce Finklesteen, John Lawrence, Larry Spelman, Ron Nelson, Tony Tsengoles and directed by Bud Townsend


The next porn musical that I saw was Swinging in The Rain. The sets were really cheap looking showing that not much money was invested in this production. All the actors sing and the songs lyrics go with the scenes showing that some thought was put into them. I was disappointed that this wasn't a spoof of Singing in The Rain, but instead was a musical history of movies through the ages. However, that really doesn't matter much since the plot was dull, the sex was dull, and the movie winds up just being dull. I was especially disappointed in this one, since it was a Cash Markman movie and I'm usually a little more pleased with his movies. I grade this one a C-

stars: Alex Dane, Brittany Andrews, Frank Bukkwyd, Joel Lawrence, Michael J. Cox, Mike Horner, Morgan Fairlane, Nicole London, Nikki Sinn, Ron Jeremy, Steve Austin, Zasu Knight and directed by Cash Markman


Recently, I rented Misty Beethoven: The Musical. Since The Opening of Misty Beethoven was a porno take on Pygmalion, this musical version of course was a porn take on My Fair Lady. The movie starts out promising, with the actors overdubbing what sounds like their own voices. Some of the songs in the movie reminded me of songs from The Rocky Horror Picture Show and most of the songs that had this sound fared better than the other songs in the production. However, overall this movie just didn't have any oomph!. The plot drags from one musical number to the next musical number. Except for Asia Carrera bringing heat to her scene, the other sex scenes were uninspired to say the least. The only other good scene in the movie was Evan Stone who does a great song showing a lot of emotion in his voice for his unrequited love. I grade this one a C-

stars: Asia Carrera, Lezley Zen, Chloe, Mia Smiles, Michelle Lay, Ava Vincent, Julie Meadows, Sunset Thomas, Misty Mason, Kelly Steele, Randy Spears, Mike Horner and directed by Veronica Hart


One last movie I am going to include is Chatterbox, which isn't a porno, but is a softcore movie from 1977. The basic plot of Chatterbox is that a woman's vagina can talk and it not only talks, but sings and it sings a lot all the way through the movie. While this is a super cute idea and funny for a while, the joke wears a bit thin over the 70 plus minutes running time. I know I normally complain about too many and too long sex scenes, but if a couple of hardcore scenes had been thrown into Chatterbox to break up the on-going humor, it would have made one hell of a great porno. I understand that Chatterbox is a remake/rip-off of a hardcore 1975 French film called Pussy Talk, so possibly the French version would be a little better. I still grade this one a C+.

stars: Candice Rialson, Larry Gelman, Jane Kean, Perry Bullington, Arlene Martel, Michael Taylor, Cynthia Hoppenfield, Robert Lipton, Rip Taylor, Professor Irwin Corey and directed by Tom DeSimone


I have read that Axel Braun is in pre-production on Grease XXX, which is supposed to run 4 hours. I'm going to hold out hope that it can measure up to Alice in Wonderland. In the meantime, I guess I can re-watch Alice in Wonderland or just tune into Glee and imagine that they're all naked!!!!

30 ROCK: A XXX PARODY

I'm a sucker for porn parodies or sitcums, even though there are so few really good ones. But I keep renting them, because when a good one comes along it's worth the effort I put in sitting through the bad ones. I'm sorry to report that 30 Rock: A XXX Parody is one of the bad ones.

Whoever thought up the plot for this 30 Rock parody must have gotten confused and thought that they were doing the Not Seinfeld sitcum, since the movie is about nothing. The sparse plot revolves around trying to get better ratings for the show.

30 Rock: A XXX Parody has to rely on the characters to move the story along. You had better be familiar with the NBC 30 Rock characters or a lot of things in this movie may not make much sense. Also, be warned that none of the actors look very much like their real life counterparts.

Before renting this movie, I never bothered to check who was playing Tina Fey's part in 30 Rock: A XXX Parody. I should have known it would be Lisa Ann since she plays Palin in porn movies and Tina Fey played Palin on SNL, then of course logic dictates Lisa Ann playing Tina Fey. In my review of Letterman's Nailin Palin I said "Lisa Ann might look slightly like Palin (if you were drunk and squinted)", well to believe Lisa Ann is Tina Fey/Liz Lemon you would have to be drunk, squinting.....oh, who am I fooling, nothing will make you believe that Lisa Ann is Tina Fey. I knew Lisa Ann was bad in Letterman's Nalin Palin, but since that movie was so short, I thought maybe in a longer format she would improve. Unfortunately this wasn't the case. Lisa Ann obviously still thinks acting is "just wearing glasses".

30 Rock: A XXX Parody did have a few giggles here and there, but the best part of 30 Rock: A XXX Parody is actually a non sex role. Bishop plays the Tracy Morgan/Jordan character and he gets the same crazy lines and is the same crazy character that Tracy Morgan is on 30 Rock. Either Bishop really “got” his role or someone put a lot of effort into getting all the funny into this one character. I mean Bishop is laugh out loud funny and almost worth the cost of a rental, but just almost. I'm grading this one C-



30 Rock: A XXX Parody stars Lisa Ann, Amy Ried, Ashlynn Brooke, Ralph Long, Evie Delatosso, Lana Violet, Rebecca Linares, James Deen, Erik Everhard, Herschel Savage, Chris Cannon and is directed by Lee Roy Meyers.

LETTERMAN'S NAILIN' PALIN

Randy Spears plays David Letterman and presents a Top 11 list. Dave/Randy's first guest is Governor Sanford and there's a little joking around in the Letterman style. Obama is the next guest and after a few more jokes, Palin played by Lisa Ann appears. Palin starts to have sex with Sanford and Obama, Dave joins in, but soon makes Obama and Sanford leave. At the end of the sex scene, Sanford and Obama come back for pop shots. That's really the end of the movie. The rest of the DVD is filled with Lisa Ann scenes from other movies.

There’s things that I like about this movie: Randy does a good job imitating Letterman. The comedy writing during the Letterman segment was just as good as you get on the real show. Plus, The Top 11 list is pretty darn good, at least equal to most of The Top 10 lists on the real show.

Unfortunately, there's a lot of things that I didn't like about the movie: The actor playing Paul decided being bald and having a funky looking set of glasses was all that was needed for his role. The actor playing Sanford didn't even try for any type of imitation and the actor playing Obama wasn't much better. And finally, Lisa Ann might look slightly like Palin (if you were drunk and squinted), but she has very little acting ability. It appears that she thinks as long as she keeps her glasses on (and she struggles to keep them on during her sex scene) that she's really got this acting thing down. Adding to my misery are Lisa Ann's very, very bad fake boobs!

What puzzles me is that this is really only a 30-40 minute movie (including the sex scene), the rest of the movie is filled out with different clips from other Lisa Ann movies. It would have been easy to fill out the movie with a flashback sex scene of Sanford and his Argentina lover. Another scene could have been Obama in the Green Room with a female Secret Service Agent. Even the Paul character could have had his own scene with as the real Paul would say "some groovy music groupies". I'm not even that clever and it didn't take me but a second to think of these other scenes. With the top notch writing of the one scene that was actually the movie, this could have been a really outstanding porno. But just giving the viewer one scene and a lot of clips just doesn't do it for me. I'm giving this one a D+.

Letterman's Nailin Palin starring Lisa Ann, Sascha, Marco Banderas, Tyler Knight, C.J. Wright, Eric John, Mick Blue, Randy Spears and directed by Axel Braun

STOOD UP

I would categorize Stood Up as a mockumentary, since it stars real life comedian Bob Levy and is the fictional story of his life. At least let's hope this was a fictional tale, if not, this is one more unlucky S.O.B.

Stood Up is about how Bob Levy met his agent Savanna and all the crummy gigs and bad luck he has had over the years. Bob is telling his story to Moni Michaels and in the first scene we see how the younger Bob met his agent and of course this sets up the first sex scene. The younger Bob is played by Tommy Gunn, actually Bob Levy doesn't have any sex scenes in the movie.

In the second scene Bob is playing a Bachelor Party, but he gets kicked out and the next comedian, played by Lee Stone, is a foul loud mouth who steals Bob's dirty nursery rhymes...think Andrew Dice Clay. And instead of Bob, the strippers at the party have sex with Lee Stone.

Bob is on to another lousy gig, this time at a Jewish wedding and his act isn't going over too well. However the waiter "Jerry" played by James Deen hits it off with Penny Flame and they go off and have sex. I note the name of the waiter, since we learn that Bob had an original idea for a sitcom, but someone else stole his idea…think “Seinfield“.

The fourth scene finds Bob down South, and you guessed it, Bob has another great comic idea stolen... this time think Jeff Foxworthy. On top of that, Bob gets beat up and Evan Stone winds up with Bob's agent and Kimberly Kane for the sex scene.

The final scene has Bob ready to score with Moni, but he has to finish his next set first. While he's on stage, Savanna gets the girl! Poor Bob, he just doesn't have any luck!

I struggled with the rating on this movie. The story line while brief is very good, but it could have been fleshed out with some more comedy routines from Bob Levy. The sex scenes were way too long, even longer than most modern day porno feature movie scenes. The sex scenes in Stood Up run close to 30 minutes. However, two of the scenes, even though long, generated enough on screen heat to keep me from hitting the fast forward button. These two scenes are the one with Penny Flame and James Deen and the one with Evan Stone, Savanna Sampson and Kimberly Kane. And add in that the making of featurette was entertaining and I grade it a C+, but just barely. Hey, two puns in one paragraph (fleshed out and barely).

Stood Up starring Bob Levy, Evan Stone, James Deen, Kimberly Franklin, Kimberly Kane, Lanny Barby, Lee Stone, Moni Michaels, Penny Flame, Savanna Samson, Tommy Gunn and directed by: B. Skow

JUGSY

Here's what the box says: "Herschel Savage shoots from the hip on a journey into the seedy underworld of (dis)organized crime. Meet Jugsy, a stripper who bares more than her soul in a tale so torrid it`ll curl your spats. Grab a table and dim the lights. Jugsy will blow you away."

Here's what Mr. X-Ray has to say: I had high hopes for this one, after seeing the great job that Herschel Savage did with his parody of the Addams Family (See my Maddams Family review below). I rented this one with the assumption that Jugsy would be a take-off on the movie Bugsy.

But there's barely a storyline in this movie at all. Just some very short lines of dialog that connect the sex scenes, so this one was a major disappointment. And to add to my misery, most of the women were not very attractive. I grade this one a D.

Jugsy starring PJ Sparxx, Madison, Heidi, Heather Lere, E.Z. Ryder, Rob Tyler, Sean Michaels, Steve Drake and directed by Herschel Savage.

NOT THREE'S COMPANY XXX

The plot: Jack loses his job as a chef, so Chrissy gets a night job to help out. Because of things overheard, the rest of the cast assume that Chrissy has become a prostitute. Just like a real Three's Company plot: Something is said...and that something is misconstrued as something else and hilarity ensues.

This is an excellent porn parody. There are several factors that all combine to make it stand out among some of the other recently released porn parodies.

I find two things to always be necessary for a good movie (porn or otherwise): Good casting and good writing and Not Three's Company has both.

The best bit of casting without a doubt is Penny Flame as Janet. With a wig, not only does she look the part but her acting will make you think she is the real Janet. Penny Flame even stays in character during her sex scene (listen to her dialog during her scene). Next best casting: Nina Hartley makes a great Mrs. Roper. Van Damage is not too bad as Jack and the same can be said for Brynn Tyler as Christie. And a special note for the outstanding non-sex role by James Bartholet as The Doctor.

An odd bit of casting is Ron Jeremy as the bartender at The Regal Beaver. This is a non-sex role and I see no particular reasoning for him being cast in this movie, except for the name recognition on the box.

An interesting tidbit about the casting: Tommy Gunn was forced to shave his mustache for the role of Larry. I say forced, since the word was that they would kill him off in the Pirates series if he didn't. So after going to all the trouble of having him shave his mustache, they give him one more super bad fake wig.

Besides the casting, the writing is so good that it made me think that it was just a long lost Three's Company script.

A few other factors add to Not Three's Company to make it such an excellent sitcum:

The sets are colorful and reminiscent of the real show.

The audience “oohs” and “aahs” and applause spots are included in the right spots and the laugh track is reminiscent of the real TV show.

The movie ends just like a Three's Co. would end: with a little break to a blackout where a commercial would normally be and returning with a bumper spot.

And to top everything off, the theme song to Not Three's Company sounds like the real theme song only with different lyrics (check it out below in the trailer)

Not Three's Company definitely grades an A.

Not Three's Company XXX starring Nina Hartley, Penny Flame, Jenny Hendrix, Roxy Jezel, Sienna West, Van Damage, Madison Scott, Allyssa Hall, Brynn Tyler, Eric Swiss, James Bartholet, Dino Bravo, Tommy Gunn, Ron Jeremy, Scott Lyons and directed by Will Ryder