Wednesday, June 17, 2009

JANE BOND Meets OCTOPUSSY


After watching the last two modern "serious pornos", I decided maybe I needed to dip back into the classics for something with a little humor. Jane Bond Meets Octopussy sounded like a good title and the spoofing of a spy movie would probably be fairly humorous. Well, guess what.....I was wrong again.

The movie is about Octopussy having a ray that turns women into sluts and weakens men. Jane Bond goes undercover to get inside Octopussy's mansion. When she arrives she finds that headquarters has mistakenly assigned a file clerk to be Jane's backup. After a few adventures and sex scenes at the house, Jane is found out, but before Octopussy can kill her, she zaps Octopussy with her own sex ray.

Now even with this skimpy plot, there should have been room for some humor, but those lines were few and far between. The tip off that this movie was badly written is near the first, when the file clerk (who wears sparkles in her hair) is asked her undercover name, she says "Tiffany"........WTF.......no one could think of a funny spoof name? Well, at least the sparkles were cool!

The movie wasn't a complete waste of time, I mean I didn't have to do any FF and I wasn't bored; I was just disappointed, since I was expecting a lot more from this classic porno than it could deliver.

OCTOPUSSY - directed by Jack Remy and starring: Amber Lynn, Porsche Lynn, Kristara Barrington, Lorrie Lovett, Blondie, Mauvis DeNoire, Tony Romano, Gary Barker, Randy West

2 comments:

Roger Feelbert said...

Too bad this wasn't quite what you were looking for. Still, at least you weren't bored.

Anonymous said...

Well, that sucks! I watched Octopussy a lot when I was a kid, too, so when I saw this title I was hoping you would give it a positive review. Those classics are hit/miss just like the new ones though. Best of luck with your next screening - sounds like you need a winner after so many disappointments. If you haven't seen The Opening of Misty Beethoven (I'm sure you have, but I hadn't seen it until very recently, so who knows), watch it. It will restore all of your faith, and enable you to move forward with hope and happiness in your heart.