Pirates: Stagnetti's Revenge

Here's the basic plot: The story picks up with pirate hunters Edward (Evan Stone) and Jules (Jesse Jane), who having routed the sadistic Stagnetti seek a pardon for ex-pirate Serena (Janine in the original), along with her sister Olivia (Belladonna). They run afowl of evil pirate empress Xi-Feng (Katsuni) who kidnaps Jules and bewitches her with a magic potion. There are fights with monsters, a giant sea squid, swordplay with skeletons, duels to the death, and other special effects.

I personally found the movie to be mostly boring from start to finish. I know part of this could be that I had already seen the big production values in the first Pirates movie and wasn't "wowed" by them this time around. And with all the ballyhoo about this movie costing ten million dollars, you would think that they could get the sound level right. Any scene that takes place on a ship deck is muted by the sound of wind or too loud music.

My only complaint in the original was that the female actresses weren't very good, but just about all the acting in Stagnetti is good. The only actress that I didn't think could deliver her lines in Stagnetti was Sasha Grey. Since she is playing the title role in Steven Soderbergh's The Girlfriend Experience, this surprised me. Maybe he was able to elicit more of a performance from her than she gives in this movie.

The sex scenes in Stagnetti are edited at a quick pace(I understand that in the extras, you get the scenes in longer format), they are short compared to most sex scenes in modern porn movies. They are more like the length of 70's & 80s porn sex scenes. I have no complaint with this, since I don't have to view scenes that drone on too long before they reach the same outcome....If you don't know what the outcome is...why the hell are you reading this :-) ...go rent the Johnny Depp Pirate movies.

One scene stands out from the rest of the movie and it's a sex scene, the g/g scene with Belladonna and Jesse Jane. These two are supposed to despise each other and their sex scene coveys these emotions with slapping, spitting, hair pulling, choking, and multiple fingers anally inserted. A rough scene, but it really delivers the fact that they hate each other, without using dialog.


I know they are making a Pirates 3.....I wish they wouldn't....I really don't won't to see another one....but know I will watch 3.....with hope that it is better than Pirates #2: Stagnetti's Revenge

Stagnetti's Revenge: directed by: Joone and starring: Jenna Haze, Sasha Grey, Shyla Stylez, Jesse Jane, Shawna Lenee, Brianna Love, Stoya, Gabriella Fox, Belladonna, Katsuni, Veronica Rayne, Marco Banderas, Riley Steele, Charles Dera, Abbey Brooks, Rhylee Richards, Brea Lynn, Tommy Gunn, Evan Stone, James Deen, Manuel Ferrara, Mick Blue, Ben English

Porn Gets Close To Mainstream

PIRATES directed by JOONE. Starring: Jesse Jane, Carmen Luvana, Tegan Presley, Evan Stone, Tommy Gunn, Steven St. Croix, Kris Slater, Devon, Austyn Moore, Janine.

THE PLOT: In 1763, the Caribbean is awash in pirates. The worst is Stagnetti, backed by his bloodthirsty first mate, Serena. He wants the Scepter of Inca, which gives its owner great powers. To remove it from remote Calaveras Island, he needs the Dagger of Ataljuapa as well as the aid of a descendant of the family to whom the Scepter was entrusted. So, he kidnaps Manuel Valenzuela, honeymooning with the lovely Isabella. On Stagnetti's trail are pirate hunters, Captain Edward Reynolds and Jules, his commander. Edward's a bit clueless, but he does rescue Isabella. Once Stagnetti has the Dagger, the stage is set for the clash of good and evil.

Pirates is a good case for porn with a plot. One of the best sellers of the last few years, this illustrates the point that porn with a plot is of interest to a great many people. Probably the biggest surprise is that the movie had some special effects that are pretty darn good.

Pirates is not really a spoof of Pirates of the Caribbean, but actually another take on the same type of movie. As an interesting side note, some scenes were shot on a real life sailing ship, a St. Petersburg, Florida-based replica of the HMS Bounty. The owners of the ship were not aware of the true nature of the film as they were advised that the film being made was a "Disney-type" pirate film for families.

The first 80 minutes of Pirates has the story upfront and you get the feeling that the sex scenes are put in as obligatory to the fact that this is a porn movie. In the last part of the movie, the story starts to slip away and more sex scenes are inserted. I had the feeling that a certain number of scenes had to be included and now the director had to rush to get them all in. However, the plot remains coherent and continues to the end, which sets up for a sequel.

Pirates has great over the top hammy comic acting from Evan Stone. Tommy Gunn, who can act, (but always seems like he'd rather not in previous movies I have seen him in), does a great job; as does the great Steven St. Croix. Unfortunately on the female side, only Janine shows any acting chops and the rest of the female cast appears most of the time to be reciting their memorized lines.

So, if you're looking for a porn movie with lots of plot, action, comedy, and special effects, then check this one out. I don't think you'll be disappointed.