CAPTAIN AMERICA XXX

  
Captain America XXX starring Evan Stone, Charley Chase, Ashli Orion, Jacky Joy, Sean Michaels, Juelz Ventura, Alec Knight, Jennifer White, Dane Cross, India Summer, Bill Bailey, Tara Lynn Foxx, Lizzy Borden, Scott Lyons and directed by Sinister X (Rob Black)

The Plot: Captain America has been frozen since the end of WWII. Now he has been thawed out and must save America from The Red Skull and Madame Hydra.

: Since I had just watched the excellent Spider-Man XXX, I thought I would take another go at a Marvel Comics Hero - this time Captain America. Unfortunately, Captain America XXX didn't live up to the previously mentioned movie. While it had its moments, there just wasn't anything to elevate it above any of the other modern day porn spoofs.

I personally thought Evan Stone was miscast in the titular role. While I'm a big fan of Evan's, I think he's much better in a role where he can "ham it up". In Captain America XXX he had to play it straight and it just didn't work for me, plus I felt he was just a little bit too short for the role.

The one reason I can think of to recommend this movie is India Summer's portrayal of Sarah Palin, it ranks right up there with Tina Fey's and Julianne Moore's. Speaking of Palin, Captain America XXX did a thorough job of "giving it" to the Republican Party and The Tea-Baggers....OOPS, I meant Tea Partiers. So, if you've got Right leaning political tendencies, this movie is probably not for you. I would normally grade this a C, but due to Summer's Palin, I"m upgrading it to a C+

ANCHORMAN: A XXX PARODY

Anchorman - A XXX Parody starring Jack Lawrence, India Summer, Anthony Rosano, Eric Masterson, Dana DeArmond, Dale DaBone, Aiden Starr, Tasha Reign, Dylan Ryan, Adriana Sephora with a non-sex cameo by Nina Hartley and directed by Eddie Powell.


It's been a long time since I saw Anchorman and I really don't recall the plot. I found it wasn't necessary to be overly familiar with the original film, because I really enjoyed this movie. In Anchorman - A XXX Parody, Ron Burgundy has made the big time, but gets fired because of a "boob" necklace he wears. When he goes back to his old station, he finds the whole news team is now made up of only women. His all male news team reassembles and hopes to take back the station. Too bad for Ron and his team, because the women are onto their scheme.


Jack Lawerence, who has never impressed me in the past, definitely did in Anchorman - A XXX Parody. Even though Lawrence is doing an imitation of Will Ferrell playing Burgundy, Lawrence seemed believable in the role, while as I remember it, Ferrell was just giving another one of his "look how stupid I can be" performances. The rest of Burgundy's news team, played by Dale DeBone, Anthony Rosano, and Eric Masterson, are also great in their roles.


It goes without saying, since this is a current day porn feature, the sex scenes are too long. I only bring this up to make a special note about Dana DeArmond in her scene with Eric Masterson. While DeArmond wasn't the only actor/performer to remain in character during their sex scenes (most likely due to the direction of Eddie Powell), it was just that Dana was so darn good at remaining in character throughout her scene, it made the segment a lot more interesting and was the standout sex scene of the movie.


This was another great comedy parody from Eddie Powell, who also directed the terrific Scooby Doo: A XXX Parody and while Anchorman: A XXX Parody isn't quite as good as the aforementioned, it still one of the better XXX parodies out there and rates a solid B.

ADDAMS FAMILY XXX

Addams Family XXX starring Evan Stone, India Summer, Nina Hartley, Aurora Snow, Charley Chase, Alanah Rae, Chris Johnson, Bill Bailey, Seth Gamble, Barry Scott, Brandy Aniston, Alison Tyler, Dick Chibbles and directed by Rodney Moore.


The Plot: The Addams children are all grown up and ready to go off to college. Before Wednesday and Pugsley leave for school, Gomez and Morticia decide it's time to have “the talk” with them. This being The Addams Family things are a little different. Gomez brings Pugsley a hooker to teach him sex, while Morticia has Thing teach Wednesday about female masturbation.

: I wasn't familiar with the director of Addams Family XXX and had little hope the movie would be very good. I thought Evan Stone would be the best thing about the movie and might be worth the rental. To my surprise, several other actor/performers held their own with Evan and made Addams Family XXX an enjoyable watch.


Evan did his normal outstanding job of actually understanding the character he was portraying (something a lot of porn actors don't) and was great in his part. I also have to commend several others: India Summer as Morticia, whose acting and interaction with Evan as Gomez was spot on. Aurora Snow as the college recruiter was also outstanding in her role. Both of these performers impressed me with their acting ability. Finally, I would be remiss if I didn't mention Nina Hartley, almost unrecognizable in her makeup, having the guts to play Grandmama .

Also of note in Addams Family XXX is the use of "Thing", not only in his usual duties (delivering the mail, lighting cigars, etc) but also in the ways only possible in an X rated movie. This was something which an earlier parody of The Addams Family, The Maddams Family didn't include.


I don't want to give the impression Addams Family XXX is a great porn parody. It has several things wrong: cheap sets, long drawn out badly shot sex scenes, cheap costuming, bad facial make-up (which may look better in the black and white version, but looks horrid at times in the color version). However, Addams Family XXX does illustrate how decent writing, plus good casting and acting ability of the performers can lift a porn parody from being an average or below average parody to the grade I'm giving this one: B-

NOT MARRIED WITH CHILDREN XXX #2

All the main players are back with Eric Swiss excellent as Al Bundy and Brittany O'Connell great in the role of Peg Bundy. To me, I still feel like Kagney Linn Carter and Dane Cross are not cast correctly as Kelly and Bud. I just never get the feeling I'm seeing Kelly and Bud like I do with Eric and Brittany's portrayals of Al and Peg. Much better in their characters are India Summer (who once again gets the bad porno parody wig) and Dino Bravo as next door neighbors Marcie and Steve.

The plot in Not Married With Children XXX 2 (NMC2) finds the Bundy family barely making ends meet. Luckily, Bud knows a girl that will get him the winning lotto numbers for $1,000. Al takes a chance and ponies up the money. Surprisingly the numbers are good and The Bundys win a million dollars. Al keeps his job at the shoe store, but he can now dole out money to the family freely....at least for a while....OH,COME ON NOW....You didn't actually think there wasn't going to be a hitch to his winnings did you?

This is a very well constructed movie, as I have come to expect from Will Ryder. The plot was just like one you would have seen on the TV show. The sets and the acting were both good and I laughed many times while watching NMC2. The sex scenes were in my opinion too long, but they were integrated into the plot and flowed with the story. My problem with NMC2 is that I got the feeling "been there, seen that". I'm rating it a B but I'm sure it would have rated higher, IF I hadn't already seen the first Not Married With Children XXX.

Not Married With Children XXX #2, starring Kagney Linn Karter, India Summer, Faye Reagan, Brittany O'Connell, Eric Swiss, Jessica Bangkok, Madelyn Marie, James Bartholet, Dino Bravo, Farrah Foxx, Barrett Blade, Scott Lyons, directed by Will Ryder and written by Will Ryder under the pen name Jeff Mullen

NOT MARRIED WITH CHILDREN XXX

This XXX movie is pretty much like any episode of TV's Married with Children. The main plot revolves around Al and his job at the shoe store. There's a new salesman at the store making Al look bad. If Al doesn't pick up the pace, he's going to lose his job. I know that sounds sort of skimpy, but Not Married With Children XXX, just like the TV show, is more character driven than story driven.

The real stand out in the movie is Eric Swiss playing Al. While, he doesn't look that much like Al (Ed O'Neill), he's got the character's mannerisms and speech patterns down pat. In my opinion he carries the whole movie. Casting Brittany O'Connell as Peg was a good choice. While a lot of the character of Peg lies in the big red wig and her clothes, the role also calls for someone that can deliver the "Peg lines" with the right attitude and Brittaney did an excellent job in her role.

The two actors playing Kelly (Kagney Linn Karter) and Bud (Dane Cross) didn't do anything to distinguish themselves. I never got the feeling that I was seeing Kelly or Bud, just two fairly decent porno actors. India Summer plays Marcie and also does a good job, but she obliviously got awarded the bad wig (every time I see a parody, one character always has a bad wig). This wig ranks right up there with the bad wig that Tommy Gunn had in Not Three's Company.


Not Married With Children XXX was well written, well directed, and the set inside the Bundy's house was spot on. The audience noises and laughs were all in the right places and you could almost believe that you were watching the regular TV version of Married With Children. The only real difference in the TV show and this parody version is instead of implied sex, there is actual sex. There was only one bad scene in the movie and it was a sex scene involving a BJ that was so badly executed, I just wound up laughing. However, that one scene wasn't enough to discourage me from enjoying this movie and giving it an A-

Not Married With Children XXX starring Kagney Linn Karter, India Summers, Dane Cross, Payton Leigh, Brittany O'Connell, Madison Scott, Brooke Belle, Eric Swiss, Kimber James, Allyssa Hall, Emy Reyes, Kora Cummings and directed by Will Ryder