Friday, December 30, 2011

OPERATION: TROPICAL STORMY


Operation: Tropical Stormy starring Stormy Daniels and Evan Stone with Annabelle Lee, Bella Ling, Carolyn Reese, Dave Cummings, Desiree Diamond, Devon Lee, Gianna Lynn, Havana Ginger, India Summer, Julius Ceazher, Marcus London, Mark Wood, Mia Lelani, Mikayla Mendez, Mya Luanna, Nikki Rhodes, Randy Spears, Renae Cruz, Sammie Rhodes, Shyla Stylez, Tee Reel, Tommy Gunn, Tony De Sergio, Voodoo and directed by Stormy.


Operation: Tropical Stormy is a sequel to Operation: Desert Stormy which was a really good XXX comedy, but Desert (2007) predates this blog's existence. One of the main changes in Tropical Stormy is Evan Stone has replaced Steven St. Croix as Stormy's husband/fellow agent. My understanding is St. Croix held out for more money and so they replaced him with Stone. The plot handles this by having St. Croix's life being in danger and he's given plastic surgery to ward off the hit that has been placed on him. They make him look like the porn star "Evan Stone", even including a penis enlargement in the process. They use this opportunity, and also later in the film, to make a few jokes at the expense of St. Croix.


There's a lot of story and a lot of comedy before getting to the main plot: Stormy and Evan wind up shipwrecked on an island where a lovelorn Korean dictator is plotting to take over the world with poisoned BBQ sauce. With a lot of twists, Stormy and Evan wind up foiling his plans and save The USA.


Operation: Tropical Stormy appeared to have a fairly decent budget and was a very well written comedic movie with some added action sequences. Both Evan and Stormy are two of the top notch adult performers around today. They are both deft, at not only physical comedy, but also at having fun with their characters, even if they have to look a little silly doing so. After all of the laughs I had while watching the movie, I was a little taken aback at the downbeat ending, which appeared to be setting up for a third film in the series. Operation: Tropical Stormy's weakest part were the sex scenes, not a one stood out as being anything but average. My grade for this movie: B

Thursday, December 29, 2011

ANCHORMAN: A XXX PARODY

Anchorman - A XXX Parody starring Jack Lawrence, India Summer, Anthony Rosano, Eric Masterson, Dana DeArmond, Dale DaBone, Aiden Starr, Tasha Reign, Dylan Ryan, Adriana Sephora with a non-sex cameo by Nina Hartley and directed by Eddie Powell.


It's been a long time since I saw Anchorman and I really don't recall the plot. I found it wasn't necessary to be overly familiar with the original film, because I really enjoyed this movie. In Anchorman - A XXX Parody, Ron Burgundy has made the big time, but gets fired because of a "boob" necklace he wears. When he goes back to his old station, he finds the whole news team is now made up of only women. His all male news team reassembles and hopes to take back the station. Too bad for Ron and his team, because the women are onto their scheme.


Jack Lawerence, who has never impressed me in the past, definitely did in Anchorman - A XXX Parody. Even though Lawrence is doing an imitation of Will Ferrell playing Burgundy, Lawrence seemed believable in the role, while as I remember it, Ferrell was just giving another one of his "look how stupid I can be" performances. The rest of Burgundy's news team, played by Dale DeBone, Anthony Rosano, and Eric Masterson, are also great in their roles.


It goes without saying, since this is a current day porn feature, the sex scenes are too long. I only bring this up to make a special note about Dana DeArmond in her scene with Eric Masterson. While DeArmond wasn't the only actor/performer to remain in character during their sex scenes (most likely due to the direction of Eddie Powell), it was just that Dana was so darn good at remaining in character throughout her scene, it made the segment a lot more interesting and was the standout sex scene of the movie.


This was another great comedy parody from Eddie Powell, who also directed the terrific Scooby Doo: A XXX Parody and while Anchorman: A XXX Parody isn't quite as good as the aforementioned, it still one of the better XXX parodies out there and rates a solid B.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

ELVIS - A PORN PARODY

Elvis - A Porn Parody starring J. Jay, Dale DaBone, Lexi Belle, Andy San Dimas, Alec Knight, Tyler Knight, Jessica Bangkok, Codi Carmichael, Jesse Palmer, Asa Akira, Ron Jeremy and directed by Alex Braun.


When I saw the title of this movie, I thought there wasn't a chance in Hell it would be any good. I even said to myself 'These parodies are getting out of hand" to which I replied to myself "Duh". To my delight, Elvis - A Porn Parody turned out to be a cut above most of the parodies out there. Although not noted, the film is really a parody of the documentary This Is Elvis, giving an overview of the life of Elvis...albeit this time with a porn slant.


Directed by Alex Braun (This Aint Star Trek #1 and This Aint' Star Trek #2) and starring Jay J as the younger Elvis and Dale DaBone as the older Elvis, the movie is also able to include other notable stars within the documentary framework: Ann-Margret (Lexi Belle), Priscilla Presley (Andy San Dimas), Mohammad Ali (Tyler Knight), Marilyn Monroe (Codi Carmichael), Natalie Wood (Jessie Palmer) and James Dean (James Deen - playing his namesake) and even Ron Jeremy makes an appearance as Elvis' second cousin (thrice removed).


While Jay J was good as young Elvis, it's Dale Dabone as the older Elvis who really got into his character. He must have really liked playing Elvis, since I saw he even went as Elvis to the AVN award show. It would be hard to single out the best supporting actor, everyone brought their "A" game, but Deen as Dean and Tyler as Ali really stood out in this excellent cast.


Elvis A Porn Parody had a progression that made logical sense, and since it was told in a documentary style, it could easily move from one facet of Elvis' life to the next and include a sex scene without looking as though it was shoved into the film. The Marilyn segment was the only exception. It was the last sex scene and it appeared rushed, like it was time to wrap things up and end the movie. There were several song parodies of Elvis' songs and a fair amount of humor sprinkled throughout the movie. I'm giving Elvis A Porn Parody a solid B.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

THIS ISN'T CHRISTMAS VACATION


This Isn't Christmas Vacation starring Anthony Rosano, Carolyn Reese, Emma Heart, Alec Knight, Tweety Valentine, Marco Rivera, Melanie Rios, Sonny Hicks and directed by Sammy Slater.


As XXX parodies go, This Isn't Christmas Vacation ranks pretty far down the list. There's really only a few things good in this parody. The front artwork on the box duplicates the mainstream movie's artwork fairly close and gave me hope for a good parody. People say "don't judge a book by its cover" and in my case, I guess they should have reminded me "don't judge a porno by it's cover".


The movie only makes a couple of attempts to remind us of the movie it's supposed to be parodying. Clark (Anthony Rosano) doesn't get his bonus, instead his boss enrolls him in The Dildo of The Month Club. Other than that plot point and having Cousin Eddie (Alec Knight) show up in his camper, This Isn't Christmas Vacation pretty much rambles around setting up the four LONG sex scenes. Oh yeah, the squirrel in the Christmas tree shows up near the end.


This Isn't Christmas Vacation has a few laughs in the first part, but the second half of the movie is taken up almost entirely of sex scenes. This Isn't Christmas Vacation is one of the few feature XXX Christmas Movies around and I had high hopes for it. Other than Alec Knight doing a pretty good (not great, but still the standout performance in this movie) Cousin Eddie and the movie being Christmas themed, I can't really think of any reason to recommend this one to anyone. I'm giving it a D+ and it only gets the "+" because of Alec Knight and the artwork on the box.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

LOVE IS A DANGEROUS GAME

Love Is A Dangerous Game starring Natasha Nice, Richie, Kimberly Kane, Rocco Reed, Xander Corvus, Jack Lawrence, Alyssa Branch, Kelly Klass. Written by Jacky St. James and directed by Eddie Powell


The Plot: Paulina (Natasha Nice - who in my opinion is a "ringer" for Katie Holmes) writes Childrens Books, but is burnt out and wants to move into the world of Horror. She contacts her favorite author (Richie) for advice and a connection develops between the two, even though she is warned that he may be as crazy as some of the characters in his books.

: I had heard good things about New Sensations Romance Series, but was still reluctant to check one of the releases out. I thought they would be along the lines of the mainstream Harlequin and/or Danielle Steele group of movies released several years ago with just some long drawn out sex scenes inserted in the storyline. If Love Is A Dangerous Game is a good representative of this group of films, then I couldn't have been more wrong.


Love Is A Dangerous Game had a logical well written plot. The sex scenes flowed with the natural progression of the movie with one exception (One used a standard porn set-up, so out of place in this movie, that it didn't fit with the rest of the film). Even the sex scenes are shot with a different sensibility, making them much more interesting than your usual "by the number" sex scenes. The sex scenes are even a little shorter than modern day scenes, only running around 15 minutes. The humor sprinkled throughout adds even more in making this such an outstanding movie.


While it appeared the plot was taking an easy way out for a resolution to the story, Jacky St. James was really setting the viewer up for a twist ending. So pay attention, or you'll wind up like me and have to watch the ending a second time to "get it". Love Is A Dangerous Game came close to getting an A+ from me, but due to the one scene, as mentioned in the previous paragraph, I'm giving it an A

Saturday, November 12, 2011

ADDAMS FAMILY XXX

Addams Family XXX starring Evan Stone, India Summer, Nina Hartley, Aurora Snow, Charley Chase, Alanah Rae, Chris Johnson, Bill Bailey, Seth Gamble, Barry Scott, Brandy Aniston, Alison Tyler, Dick Chibbles and directed by Rodney Moore.


The Plot: The Addams children are all grown up and ready to go off to college. Before Wednesday and Pugsley leave for school, Gomez and Morticia decide it's time to have “the talk” with them. This being The Addams Family things are a little different. Gomez brings Pugsley a hooker to teach him sex, while Morticia has Thing teach Wednesday about female masturbation.

: I wasn't familiar with the director of Addams Family XXX and had little hope the movie would be very good. I thought Evan Stone would be the best thing about the movie and might be worth the rental. To my surprise, several other actor/performers held their own with Evan and made Addams Family XXX an enjoyable watch.


Evan did his normal outstanding job of actually understanding the character he was portraying (something a lot of porn actors don't) and was great in his part. I also have to commend several others: India Summer as Morticia, whose acting and interaction with Evan as Gomez was spot on. Aurora Snow as the college recruiter was also outstanding in her role. Both of these performers impressed me with their acting ability. Finally, I would be remiss if I didn't mention Nina Hartley, almost unrecognizable in her makeup, having the guts to play Grandmama .

Also of note in Addams Family XXX is the use of "Thing", not only in his usual duties (delivering the mail, lighting cigars, etc) but also in the ways only possible in an X rated movie. This was something which an earlier parody of The Addams Family, The Maddams Family didn't include.


I don't want to give the impression Addams Family XXX is a great porn parody. It has several things wrong: cheap sets, long drawn out badly shot sex scenes, cheap costuming, bad facial make-up (which may look better in the black and white version, but looks horrid at times in the color version). However, Addams Family XXX does illustrate how decent writing, plus good casting and acting ability of the performers can lift a porn parody from being an average or below average parody to the grade I'm giving this one: B-

Monday, October 31, 2011

HUNG WANKENSTEIN
aka HUNG WANKERSTEIN



Hung Wankenstein aka Hung Wankerstein starring Ava Vincent, Felicia Fox (as Felica Fox), Isabella Camille, Kylie Ireland, Shanna McCullough, Anthony Crane, Evan Stone, Jason McCain, Randy Spears, Ron Jeremy. George Kaplan (non sex) and directed by Jim Enright

The Plot: a parody of Young Frankenstein. Randy Spears inherits a castle from a distant uncle (Ron Jeremy). The monster (Evan Stone) who resides there doesn't need to be brought back to life, but only have a part of him upgraded.


: Hung Wankenstein was made in 2001 and is reminiscent of some of the older porn parodies, where not only the sex scenes, but the storyline was also important in the making of the movie.

Randy Spears as The Doctor and Evan Stone as The Monster are both great in their parts, but the real standout in the movie is Anthony Crane as The Hunchback. He gets most of the best lines, while the other characters play straight man for him.

There were only a couple of minor flaws in Hung Wankenstein:

The first two sex scenes are self-referential letting the viewer know the movie is moving to a sex scene and why the sex scene is being placed at that point. This was pretty humorous, but the idea seemed to be dropped for the rest of the movie. A pity, since this added to the humorous nature of the movie.

The other small flaw was Hung Wankenstein comes to a logical conclusion, but instead of ending, the movie has another sex scene tacked on to the end. There's no doubt it was added as an after-thought, since looking at the dvd timing strip shows two parts: 96 minutes and 20 minutes. Luckily, Jim Enright was able to make it flow with the plot of the the movie. Heck, who knows, maybe we should call this dvd "The Director's Cut".

I'm not a big fan of Mel Brooks, but I always thought Young Frankenstein was the best movie he made and the humor in Hung Wankenstein is on par with that movie. In other words, if you liked Young Frankenstein and you like a porn parody, then Hung Wankenstein is the movie for you. I grade this one a A-

Saturday, September 10, 2011

POWER OF LOVE


Power of Love starring Inari Vachs, Taylor St. Clair, Mia Smiles, Ava Vincent, Angelica Sin, Monica Mayhem, Brandi Lyons, Evan Stone, Dale DaBone, Ian Daniels, Rich Handsome, Joey Ray, and Max Steele and directed by Nick Orleans.

The Plot: Evan Stone had rather etrade than have sex with his girlfriend, Taylor St. Clair. On the advice of her girlfriend, Monica Mayhem, Taylor St. Clair signs Evan up for some re-education classes at The Love Foundation run by Inari Vachs. At The Foundation, Evan is enrolled with two other men: Dale DaBone who is obsessed with comic books and Ian Daniels, a sports nut. All three are put through various experiences to help focus their minds on sex and less on their other interests.

: The plot of Power of Love was sketchy and I had to fill in parts of the story that felt left out. I think The Foundation was turning men into a sort of "Stepford" husband/boyfriend. Near the end of the movie, Evan Stone has sex with Inari Vachs and she decides what she has been doing at The Foundation was all wrong....I know pretty bad and pretty damn chauvinistic.

This is a terrible movie with only one thing or actually, in this case, one person who kept it from being an absolutely total waste of time, Evan Stone. His "hammy" (in a good way) style of acting was enough to keep me sloughing through Power of Love until the end credits. The problem is one person can't save a disastrous piece of film-making like Power of Love. I would rate this one a D, but taking into consideration the musical soundtrack is basically just a loud, pounding, headache inducing drum machine throughout the whole film, I'm rating Power of Love a D-

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

MISBEHAVIN

MisBehavin' starring Leslie Bovee, Gloria Leonard, Kurt Mann, Dick Galan, Eric Edwards, Arcadia, Molly Malone, Jack Wrangler, Marc Valentine and directed by Chuck Vincent

The Plot: Leslie Bovee has been married numerous times. Once she divorces one of her rich husbands, she takes half of their money. God and The Devil make a bet about whether her next marriage will be for love or money and they both try to influence the outcome.

There are two other sub-plots in MisBehavin' - Molly Malone, Bovee's ex-Mother-In-Law is upset about Bovee collecting the divorce settlement from her son. She makes numerous unsuccessful attempts to kill Bovee. Malone is so completely incompetent she reminded me of the coyote in The Roadrunner cartoons. The other sub-plot is about Marc Valentine, a spurned lover of Bovee's who is trying, also very unsuccessfully, to commit suicide.

: Andrew Sarris has defined screwball comedy as "a sex comedy without the sex". MisBehavin' is a screwball comedy with sex. It contains all the necessary elements: the farcical situation of God and The Devil making a bet on humans with the rewards being souls, a plot involving marriage/courtship, slapstick, and different classes of people. The only element it really seemed to be missing was fast talking repartee. This last element was replaced with the characters "breaking the fourth wall" and talking to the audience.

The least interesting parts of MisBehavin' turned out to be the sex scenes. While they were integrated into the plot and weren't long and drawn out like modern day sex scenes, they were for the most part uninteresting and generated little or no heat.

The non-sex parts of MisBehavin' on the other hand were great fun to watch. It had a well thought out logical plot with LOTS of humor (even if sometimes, that humor did resort to some stale jokes). With the two running sub-plots, as mentioned above, the characters "breaking the fourth wall", and a surprise ending, this all added up to make for an enjoyable viewing. Without the sex scenes MisBehavin' would still be worth recommending, something I usually can't say when reviewing a XXX movie, I grade MisBehavin' a solid B.

A final note relating to my other blog Gonna Put Me In The Movies, the band Harlequin appears during the outdoor party scene at the first of MisBehavin' playing the song "Stray Pussy".

Saturday, September 3, 2011

TATTLE TALE


Tattle Tale starring Jessica Drake, Rocco Reed, Kirsten Price, Marcus London, Monique Alexander, Randy Spears, Georgia Jones, Dylan Ryder and directed by Francois Clousot

The Plot: Rocco Reed is a reporter for a gossip magazine. He shows Jessica Drake evidence of her father being involved in a ponzi scheme. If she doesn't help him get the dirt on her socialite friends, he'll run it in the magazine. Reluctantly Jessica agrees, but later finds out Reed was mainly interested in saving his magazine from going out of business (I was never clear why this plot point was added late in the movie, since it really didn't add much to the story). There's a small twist at the end of Tattle Tale, but I won't spoil it by revealing it here.

: Tattle Tale had a lot of trouble with its plot. Although the plot was simple, half the time the movie would jump to a scene leaving the viewer left to fill in how we got to that part of the story. I could blame this on either bad editing or a weak storyline. Considering the big reveal of Rocco wanting to save his paper came so late in the movie, I'm guessing the plot wasn't very well thought.

The other weakness of Tattle Tale was the acting. Only Kirsten Price can be commended for her acting. I have seen every actor in this movie previously (except for Georgia Jones) and I know they are more capable than the performances they gave in Tattle Tale.

Francois Clousot's camera work was great as usual and he briefly was able to make the camera "love" Monique Alexander's body. Clousot just didn't sustain it through Monique's entire sex scene as he did with Kirsten Price in the first sex scene in Lies. Speaking of sex scenes, the ones in Tattle Tale ran around 10-15 minutes allowing the movie to flow at a more even pace.

Tattle Tale wound up being a slight disappointment, since with all talent involved - both stars and director - I was expecting much more. Taking into consideration the weak plot and acting I can only give Tattle Tale a C.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

TWINS DO SCIENCE


Twins Do Science starring Lacey Love, Lyndsey Love, James Deen, Jack Lawrence, Brooke, Daisy, Steven St. Croix, Frank Bukkwyd and directed by Paul Thomas

The Plot: Dim-witted twins Lacey and Lyndsey Love have been living off their grandpa for years. When he dies they think they have it made, but to their disappointment they find they have to work in the field of science for a year before they can inherit his money. On top of that, they won't get an allowance, but will have to live off whatever they earn.

Their first assignment is to pick up some semen samples which, of course, they manage to lose. They call up some friends to help them collect some more samples - too bad they didn't know what they lost was bull semen and NOT human semen.

: Twins Do Science had the look and feel of a cheaply made cable TV "young teen" production. The bad acting of The Love Twins was a good fit, since they were suppose to be a couple of air-heads (heck, who knows, maybe they weren't acting). The main problem with Twins Do Science was the sex scenes. Twins Do Science could have been a fairly enjoyable light-hearted sex romp of a movie, but The Twins were incapable of any type of realistic performances during their sex scenes. At one point, one of The Twins actually takes time to look at her watch. Who knew a porno could be ruined by the sex scenes?

Twins Do Science
ended with the plot leading you to believe this would be the first in a series - I shudder to think there could have been a Twins Do Science 2. Twins Do Science would rate an F-, but since there were a couple of funny scenes (with the opening scene being the standout) and the movie had its own catchy theme song "Twins Twins Everybody Wins", I'm going to rate this one a D-

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

THIS AIN'T TWO and A HALF MEN XXX

This Ain't Two and A Half Men XXX starring Evan Stone, James Deen, Brooke Lee Adams, Dylan Ryder, Jamey Jane, Jenna Presley, Madison Ivy, Eric John, Patrick J Knight and directed by Marc Star

The Plot: Alan (James Deen) is despondent to the point of suicide about his ex-girlfriend moving in with his ex-wife. Since Charlie (Evan Stone) is currently having sex with Alan's ex-girlfriend's mother, he tells Alan he'll get her to speak to her daughter.

: This Ain't Two and A Half Men XXX started with a lot of promise and it appeared this was going to be a really good porn parody, even if it did have that cheaply made look which has become common with some of these lesser parodies. Unfortunately, after the initial opening scene, the movie deteriorated into a string of sex scenes held together by only very brief dialogue/plot scenes.

The second sex scene in the movie is a solo masturbation scene with Alan's ex-girlfriend Kandi (Jenna Presley) who, we are suppose to believe, thinks a dildo is a back massager...WTF....this scene might have played IF this was some type of period parody, but to think Kandi is THAT dumb takes a big stretch of anyone's imagination.

Brooke Lee Adams playing the part of Charlie's stalker Rose is a pretty good looking "ringer" for the part and I give her points for trying to to sound and act like Rose from the TV show. Too bad whatever she thinks TV Rose sounds like is so far off it's actually distracting listening to her(She admits in the behind the scenes she's only seen the show a couple of times).

In case you wonder about the "half-man" (a term which reminds me how they often refer to Peter Dinklage in Game of Thrones - an HBO series with so much sex, it appears it's ready made for a parody), he shows up in the last scene and makes of point of mentioning he's 18 (thus legitimizing him being in a XXX movie, albeit without a sex scene). The only saving graces to This Ain't Two and A Half Men XXX are the two lead actors, Stone and Deen. Their opening and closing scenes showed the two actors giving it their best try, but two scenes do not make a good parody, I rate this one D+

Friday, August 19, 2011

OFFICIAL PSYCHO PARODY

Official Psycho Parody starring Sara Sloane, Ryan McLane,Breanne Benson, Dane Cross, Eric Masterson, Francesca Le, Kagney Linn Karter, Katie Jordan, Lee Stone, Mark Wood, Michael Vegas, Tabitha Stevens and directed by Gary Orona

The Plot: In case there is anyone who hasn't seen the original Psycho (Is that possible?), here's a short plot summary - Woman wants to marry her boyfriend, but he wants to wait until they have some money set aside, since he is financially strapped. She steals cash from her employer and leaves town. She stops at a run down motel run by Norman Bates, who just happens to be a Psycho.

: First things first, even though this movie is titled Official Psycho Parody (I guess to distinguish it from any Unofficial one) this is not really a parody. Official Psycho Parody is what the big mainstream movie studios would call a re-imagining of an original movie. In this case, it just happens to be re-imagined as a porn movie.

Official Psycho Parody takes the basic premise as discussed in the plot summary above, then creatively comes up with its own interpretation of the main character, Norman Bates. The movie opens with titles and music very similar to the original Psycho. This sequence is in black and white, but as the movie begins it turns to color. [There is a black and white version on the extras disc OR you can just turn your color off, if you want to see Official Psycho Parody in black and white ala the original movie. Personally, the color didn't bother me.] Since Sara Sloane (a good casting choice for the Janet Leigh part) and her boyfriend are already in a hotel room at the start, I expected a sex scene but, to my surprise, the movie kept going and skipped that first sex scene many features insist on including, which can bog a plot down from the get-go.

After Sara goes back to the office, we get the plot set-up with her receiving money from one of her boss's clients, which she is supposed to take to the bank. Instead she steals the money, leaving town to meet her boyfriend and start a new life. Along the way she gets off the main road and stops at The Bates Motel, where she meets the proprietor Norman Bates (Ryan McLane, another good casting choice since McLane is able to to bring a certain twitchy creepiness to his role, reminding me of Anthony Perkins in Psycho). At this point the plot of Official Psycho Parody starts to deviate, for the most part, from the original Psycho with only the necessary inclusion of the shower scene.

I'm not going to spoil any more of the movie by going into further detail about the plot of Official Psycho Parody. I will just say it was wonderful to see someone put some thought and creativity into what could have been another run-of-the-mill endeavor. Although the plot makes logical sense and progresses from start to finish, the weakness of Official Psycho Parody comes when a couple of the sex scenes are inserted into the movie. Of the five sex scenes, two are logical, one borders on being logical and two are so illogical they almost seem as though the director is saying "wink wink nudge nudge" we're in a porn movie and now it's time for sex.

Even though it's played straight, the storyline/dialogue has a fair amount of humor with a few laugh out loud moments. A special mention should be made of Tabitha Stevens, who appears in a non-sex role in a couple of flashback sequences as Norman Bates' mother. She gives a superb over-the-top melodramatic performance.

The director, Gary Orona, understood using a minimalistic approach with music to create dramatic tension throughout Official Psycho Parody (Hmm, I wonder who he learned that from...oh yeah, that Hitchcock fellow) and how to use the right type of music. Considering all of the above, plus the great sets and the period costuming of the characters, Orona and his wife Stevens did a terrific job with Official Psycho Parody. If the sex scenes had been more fully integrated into the story line, I could have rated the movie a little bit higher; however, it still gets an A- from me.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

L.A. UNFORGIVEN

L.A. Unforgiven starring Julie Meadows, Evan Stone, Herschel Savage, Chris Cannon, Tina Cheri, Michael J. Cox, Ryan Conner, Cheyanne, Sammie and directed by Francios Clousot

The Plot: L.A. Unforgiven takes its basic plot from Chinatown - a private detective is hired to snoop on a local big time realty developer by who he is led to believe is the developer's wife. He finds the husband cheating and leaks this news to the local newspaper causing a big scandal. Then, the real wife shows up and threatens to sue the private detective.

: L.A. Unforgiven had an odd mixture of 40's noir combined with the year 2000 (when the movie was filmed). Some of the sets and costuming were more in line with the 40s, while at the same time there were outside shots of modern Los Angeles and current day automobiles. The plot was more 40's driven than modern day, since really who's getting all that upset today about a real estate developer having an affair....besides his wife. The male actors had the right suits and hats, but sported pony tails. The females in the movie had good looking 4o's style dresses, but also had bad implants and stripper shoes right out of the late 90's/early 2000's. Even with all of the above stated differences, the director, Francios Clousot, was able to make the story work by having his actor/performers be believable in their roles and never mentioning when the movie was occurring.

None of the acting was outstanding enough to be mentioned, but then again, no one was bad enough to be singled out either. Most of the sex scenes were placed logically into the plot with only one scene having such a quick set-up to appear forced into the storyline. On a side note, the sex scenes weren't mind-numbing long, only running around fifteen minutes.

Francios Clousot does a lot of cinematography for other XXX movies and in L.A. Unforgiven he has some deft camera work throughout the movie involving shadows, definitely a nod to 40's black and white noir, where shadows were an integral part of the film. After watching this movie, I think if someone gave Francious Clousot some serious cash to do a XXX feature, he could really deliver the goods. I give L.A. Unforgiven a B+

Saturday, August 6, 2011

NOT THE BRADYS XXX - PUSSY POWER

Not The Bradys XXX - Pussy Power starring Lexi Belle, Dylan Riley, James Deen, Ron Jeremy, Mike Horner, Kris Slater, Alana Evans, Mikey Butders, Tanner Mayes, Ashlyn Rae, Nicole Ray, Seth Gamble, Eric John, Lynn Lemay, Rebecca Riley and directed by Will Ryder

The Plot: Jan (Dylan Riley) wants to be popular like her sister Marcia. Her friend Monica (Tanner Mayes) advises her "Your pussy and blow jobs are the key to your success." In other words, she's got Pussy Power between her legs. Jan sets out to discover if her friend is telling her the truth.

: I'm not quite sure why I keep renting these Brady parodies. I rarely watched the original show and have only a superficial feeling for the different characters in the show. I can only assume Will Ryder, as the director, is my main motivation to rent another Brady parody, since when it comes to XXX parodies Ryder is the top man in the genre.

Not The Bradys XXX - Pussy Power had a well written plot (Jan wanting to be as popular as her big sister Marcia) which was similar to the original TV show and contained some great comedic lines. Detail was paid to the sets and the costuming, which always seems to be the case in a Ryder movie. Something I didn't notice on my initial viewing, but thought of later, was the sound was top notch, a failure of many feature porn movies. All the acting was fine in the movie and everyone stayed in character, even if loosely, through their sex scenes.

Each new Brady parody holds less and less interest for me. I enjoyed the first one Not The Bradys XXX, didn't get too much out of the second one Not The Bradys XXX: Marcia Marcia Marcia and got even less out of this third entry. IF you've never seen one of the Brady parodies OR if you're a big fan of the original show, you will probably enjoy this movie more than I did. It probably should rate at least a B+, considering all the good points I mentioned in the previous paragraph, but for me on a personal level, I grade this one C-

Saturday, July 30, 2011

THIS ISN'T FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH

This Isn't Fast Times At Ridgemont High starring Tori Black, Bridgette B, Charley Chase, Chastity Lynn, Natasha Nice, Scott Lyons, Seth Gamble, Michael Vegas, Chad Alva and directed by Sammy Slater

The Plot: This Isn't Fast Times At Ridgemont High really doesn't have a plot, but simply picks out a few key scenes from the original movie and parodies them. The movie has a running time of 142 minutes and with the four sex scenes in the movie running over 30 minutes each, this leaves only approximately 12 minutes for plot/dialogue.


: This Isn't Fast Times At Ridgemont High is a cheap, hastily put together movie, with skimpy sets and a small cast. However, there were two things which helped pull the movie up from the being the piece of dreck it could have been. The first was all of the performers stayed in character during their sex scenes. I'm sure this had to come from the direction they were given, since this doesn't happen in most XXX features. The second saving grace of This Isn't Fast Times At Ridgemont High was the acting level was, for the most part, top notch. Chad Alva was a natural playing the perpetually stoned Specoli (in this movie his character is named Spermcoli). Also outstanding were Seth Gamble in the Damone part and Natasha Nice playing the Stacy role.

With the super long sex scenes (Thank You FF Button) and the short plot, This Isn't Fast Times At Ridgemont High would have easily rated in the below average column with me, but due to the two factors I discussed above, I'm giving this one a C+

Monday, July 25, 2011

A-TEAM XXX: A PARODY


The A-Team XXX" A Parody starring Bree Olson, Chastity Lynn, Emily Parker, Evan Stone, Jack Vegas, Jessica Jaymes, Jordan Lane, Luscious Lopez, McKenzie Lee, Randy Spears, Rick Garcia, Roy Karch, Scott Lyons, Sophie Dee, Stephanie Cane, Tyler Knight, Wendy Divine, Angela Aspen and directed by David Lord.

The Plot: Bree Olson and her ex-husband both work for the same newspaper. When her husband gets photos of a drug deal involving a biker gang, the police, and a city councilman, he knows he's got a real scoop, but before he can write the "big story" he is kidnapped by the biker gang. Bree hires The A-Team to help get him back safe.

: I'm not sure I would call The A-Team XXX a parody; I personally would classify it as a remake of the original show....with, of course, hard-core sex scenes added. The A-Team XXX had an opening sequence which aped the original TV show and included the introduction of each of the cast members: Randy Spears made a pretty decent Hannibal and would have been even better if he hadn't been given such a bad wig to wear. Evan Stone plays Face and, of course, that gave him plenty of material to work with as "the pretty boy'. Scott Lyon did an outstanding job as the loose screw Murdock. Tyler Knight was born to play his role, he was a dead ringer for Mr. T and delivered his lines in the same gruff manner.

The A-Team XXX is heavy on plot with approximately one-third of the 145 minute running time given over to story with the rest going to the sex scenes. In the second half, the movie went for such a long stretch with only story and action sequences, I thought the sex scenes were over. The plot devices used to move the story along were weak in a couple of spots, but then the original TV show usually had the same type of weak spots in its plot lines.

The sex scenes in The A-Team XXX weren't completely integrated into the storyline, and for the most part used standard porn set-ups to insert them into the plot. At the same time, they weren't so jarringly inserted into the story to make them outside the realm of possibility (that may just be my own addled thinking from watching too much porn).

An interesting underlying theme in The A-Team XXX is how the male characters react to Bree Olson's character. She's told by her boyfriend not to get involved in his "man's work". Her editor asks her "if she's having her period" and tells her "women are too emotional". Even Randy Spears' character tells her "women are hard to deal with". But, Bree's character is the one who learns how to contact The A-Team and hires and pays them. Before the movie is over, Bree also has helped rescue her ex and written "the big story" herself, which causes her ex and her editor to begrudgingly praise her. In a last bit of comeuppance at the end of The A-Team XXX, Bree blackmails Randy Spears into letting her become the newest member of The A-Team. I was surprised to see this theme of misogynists being outdone by the female lead in a porn movie. However, it was only subtly placed in the story leaving a message most may not catch, but which may possibly enter their subconscious.

While The A-Team XXX isn't completely perfect, it is damn good. If you were a fan of the original The A-Team or if you're just a fan of the current wave of porn parodies, I don't think you'll be disappointed in this one and I rate it A-